Have you read Heaven by Randy Alcorn? If not, you need to. Like, yesterday. I read it years ago and it transformed my thoughts on death. Near the beginning of the book Randy writes something that anyone that lives with a fear of dying needs to read. Let me say this first – I have feared death since I was an 8 year old little girl. So much goes into it, but it is a fear that I brought into adulthood. A fear that used to frequently wake me in the middle of the night and I would panic just thinking about dying. So reading this book was a great need in my life. In it he said something to this effect…
Fearing death is normal. It is nothing to hide or to be ashamed of. We were created to live forever…for eternity. Then that sin thing ruined it. We know, instinctively, in our spirits, that we are not supposed to die. It isn’t normal. It is not how it was supposed to be.
Suddenly it made so much sense to me. I got it. I understood that.
Well, this week I was thinking about something else in my life that I find myself fighting against…and that’s hurt. Obviously, right? Who wants to feel hurt? Well, no one. But I’m talking more about soaking in it. Reliving it. Making hurt your label or what you’re identified by.
I think the death principle applies here too. It was supposed to be heaven on earth in the beginning. In my head that equals no hurt. And, again, my spirit knows that.
It’s not that I don’t know pain, shame, disappointment or hurt, I do. In fact, I can write a book on it. Wait…I am! The thing is, I don’t like to stay in it. My spirit instinctively knows that I was not meant to live in hurt. So if I have the choice and power not to…then why would I? Why would I continually relive all my pain and resurrect it?
Don’t get me wrong here, I know there are people that are tortured, abused, abandoned and rightfully hurting. I am not saying they should buck up and put a smile on. I’m not that insensitive. I am talking about having the power and choice to heal and disregarding that power and actively choosing not to heal. That is what I feel my spirit fighting against whenever I am tempted to stew in a moment.
And when I am tempted to stew my reasoning is usually selfish. What kind of attention will this get me? What might I gain? What might I be able to avoid? This is when I know I really need to address the hurt and deal with it immediately. I do not want to be responsible for stunting growth because I chose to not move beyond something that should have no power over me in the first place.
Again, I know hurt is a part of this life, this world. I get that. I do. I am not poo-poo’ing hurt all together. We all hurt. Can’t escape it. But we can go beyond the trappings of it. I really believe so.
Do I struggle with feeling hurt? Yup. All the time. Do I like it? Nope. And if I can be a part of mending that hurt and moving on you betcha I am going to as soon as I can.
So to sum it up… I believe we were not meant to sit in hurt. I believe when we choose to there are probably some underlying things going on…deeper than we might even realize. Ranging from the obvious being fear to perhaps feelings of guilt. And I do not believe in sweeping things under the rug. That’s not even a temporary fix, that’s just a recipe for disaster. I believe in standing on the strong feet and foundation God gave us and address the hurt face to face. Learn how it started, why it impacts you the way it does and why you’re holding on to it. Get to know it inside and out so that you can conquer it.