We all have a story. We all have a story worth telling. It is a part of who we are. And all our stories together make this world what it is.
We all get a role to play. The role in my story has not always been easy. But I decided many years ago that perhaps the pain others inflicted on me and the pain I inflicted on myself could be used in a way to relate to others. And perhaps the healing that has taken place in my life can serve to encourage and give hope to others.
Whatever the case…I could no longer sit idly by and not reach out to others that I could empathize and relate to.
So, here is my story…
[Below Was Originally Posted in 2010]
1987, 16 1/2 years old, i sat in an abortion clinic in southern california. alone and frightened. i didn’t show it. i couldn’t show it. i wouldn’t show it.
i no longer lived at home with my family. i had to be the big girl now. i had do the rightthing. i had to look out for me.
at all costs.
fifteen months later…i sat in the very same abortion clinic waiting to rid my life of one more mistake.
how could God love me after ending two innocent lives? why would He?
i never thought then of the repercussions my decisions would have. not once did i consider the impact those abortions would have on my life or the lives of others.
and it certainly never occurred to me then that i would one day have to tell my own daughter.
when i look at my daughter, kassidi, i don’t just see my first born…i see my first chosenborn. i see grace. i see redemption. i see mercy. i see Love.
kass knows about my abortions now. she has ministered to many girls in her high school because of what she now knows of the subject. this is God using my ashes to demonstrate His beauty and love.
Gods love has allowed kass to experience life. her life has allowed me to know Love.
i was 16 when i had my first abortion. my first born is now 16. and she sings today because He loves us…Oh, how He loves us…