Archive for Grace

| February 8, 2013
8 comments

Girls Of Grace

Being a mom of a teen girl can have its challenges. Just the hormones alone can be a conflict of interests and recipe for disaster. Being a mom to a teen girl in this society also adds to the challenges.

Having a teenage daughter has been one of my biggest blessings in life. Having a daughter who has embraced my story and past, who has chosen to let it strengthen and enlighten her, has been mind-blowing.

I love speaking into her life. I am honored to give her the best chances I possibly can. We talk about God together, boys, beauty, pain, struggles, insecurities, self-image and so much more. But there is one thing I, alone, cannot provide for her and that is her own security in Christ. That is something that I, yes, can model personally, but ultimately she must navigate this on her own. That is not to say that I, or others, can’t pour into her.

In steps…Girls Of Grace. I heard of Girls Of Grace years ago and loved it immediately for what they stood for. This is an event, founded by Point Of Grace, for teen girls. It provides a safe environment for teen girls to gather and talk about big issues affecting them. We’ve heard it said that it takes a village to raise a child…this is a village I’d want helping me out!

If you have a teen daughter and are interested in Girls Of Grace then you’re in luck! They are coming to Nashville! February 23rd the Girls Of Grace Conference will be held at Christ Church in Nashville. I will definitely be attending with my daughter, Kass, and am so excited to hear from some amazing speakers and from Point Of Grace!

If you have a teen girl, or know one that might enjoy this conference, then I encourage you to attend!

AND…a lucky someone will be winning two tickets to the Nashville event! Just leave a comment and cross your fingers =)

For more info and tickets please visit Girls Of Grace!I hope to see you there!!

Category: Abortions, abuse, accountability, Authenticity, Church, Community, courage, Faith, Family, God, Grace, Healing, insecurities, inspiration, lessons, Life, Living, Nashville, parenting, Youth |
| July 10, 2012
8 comments

If Westboro Baptist Pickets…

I might be one of the few, or only, people who won’t mind if Westboro Baptist church shows up at Cross Point this coming weekend to picket.

I have two reasons-

One: It will provide the people of Cross Point an opportunity to show grace. Westboro can witness what grace, mercy and love look like in real life, in tough situations.

Two: Perhaps one of them will turn around and get a grip on reality and see the truth and then go out and actively, lovingly, for the sake of the Kingdom, truly reach out and serve the ones outside the church. Maybe in doing so their “people whom God has cast into hell since you loaded this page.” counter in their sidebar would begin slowing down.

Pray for Westboro.

Pray for those being picketed that they would respond gracefully.

Category: Church, God, Grace, Prayer |
| November 15, 2011
8 comments

Pains Of Parenting

Yes. There are pains involved with parenting. There are times when you want to run…run as fast as you can, as far away as possible. And if there happens to be a cliff involved you might consider a little jump.

Not just because a child or two has found your very last nerve. Sometimes you wanna run because you get scared. You become afraid of all the ways you might have messed your children up. Missed the best teaching and growing opportunities. Afraid of letting go – but knowing you have to.

There have been countless times when I have cried myself to sleep at nights, begging the Lord to erase from their memories any ridiculous words that came out my mouth or actions that spewed forth, if they were not going to build character…or mine. Yes, there are times when a parents failures serve as some of the best teaching moments. It’s often where humility and grace are best learned. Boy, do I know this.

My daughter is nearing her 18th birthday. My son just turned 15. I know what this means. It means the time is coming close when they will spread their wings and no longer be in this nest. It has all happened so fast. And so, now, I spend many nights crying myself to sleep because I know this time is inevitable, and I just want to freeze this moment.

They own my heart. That’s where they always are and always will be. Even when the day comes where they will no longer physically be near me.

So when they each gave me letters, that they wrote to me for my birthday last night, all these worries, fears and anticipations came to a sudden stop. I saw their words as a collection of years gone by…good and bad…but moments that have stayed with them and made them into the young adults they are becoming.

I am so proud of my kids. No, they are not perfect. I am not perfect. Brent is not perfect. We do things that would likely shock y’all. But we’re taking each day as it comes and doing the best we can with them. And I hope they do the same with their own kiddos some day.


[Family Photo by Alece]

It’s all worth it. Every single moment.

Category: Family, Grace, humility, Kids, Life, Living, Love, Memories, opinion, parenting, perspective |
| September 18, 2011
19 comments

What Are You Waiting For?

I’m just gonna get right to the meat of this post…

I’ve been a part of many funerals and memorial services in my lifetime. And the one statement I have heard over and over is…

I wish I would’ve had the chance to tell them…

May I please point out the obvious here?

As long as we still have breath – we still have the chance.

What are you waiting for…

Tell them.

Category: Action, Community, Confessions, convictions, courage, Death, DO something, Faith, Family, Friendships, Gitz, Grace, Living, Love |
| July 12, 2011
19 comments

My Then. My now.

Our move across the country is layered with so many different memories and emotions. This is one part of that…

2011. I now live in Nashville, TN.

1990. I lived in Knoxville, TN.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the difference 20+ years can make.

The last time I lived in this state I was married to an abusive husband who held a sawed off rifle to me threatening to take my life only to end by taking his own.

Twenty-one years later I am back, living, in the same state. [but a completely different state of mind]

1990 = Frightened young little girl running for her life. Trying to find life and its meaning.

2011 = A grown up little girl embracing the gift of life…And meaning to live.

What a difference Mercy and Grace makes.

My Story Here

What’s your story?


Category: Grace, Life, Living, Marriage, Mercy, Testimony, thankfulness |
| February 14, 2011
18 comments

Marriage: Success or Failure

I don’t spend much time on this blog writing about my opinions on big issues. I write about things in life I have experienced…

Motherhood, marriage, fear, love, failure, abortions, abuse, happiness, grace, redemption.

I can share my perspective on those subjects. But I can not share anything on divorce. I’ve not been through one. Although I have a handful, plus, of people in my life at this moment who have been divorced, or are in the midst of one. I have seen the pain and anguish it can cause. I have also witnessed the freedom it has offered to a once abused spouse.

Divorce is a sticky subject.

A friend of mine recently shared a bit of her experience with divorce and said these words…

divorce is no more a sign of relationship failure than marriage is of relationship success.

Read that again.

Think about that for a second…

When I read that, I didn’t focus on the divorce half of the statement…cuz, again, I have not been through one. However, I did hone in to the last half of her words.

While a handful of my friends are divorced that doesn’t mean the several handfuls of friends who are not divorced have successful marriages. In fact, I know some of them don’t. And I’m guessing that, regardless of the appearance of blissful success, some of the others might just be one conversation away from the D-Word. Who knows.

So, if you are married, how do you measure success in your marriage?

How would you define a successful marriage?

If you are divorced, has your experience changed your view on marriage? Were there warning signs, that you can see now, you’re willing to share?

Category: Abortions, abuse, Divorce, Freedom, Grace, Life, Love, Marriage, opinion, perspective, Relationships |
| February 9, 2011
6 comments

Abortion…A Man’s Perspective

One thing I don’t talk much about when I discuss abortions is men. Not because they aren’t half involved, obviously, but because they’re typically out of the picture by the time an abortion is under way. That, or they are supportive of ending the pregnancy.

But very rarely do you hear the plight of a man begging the mother of his unborn child not to go through with an abortion. Listen, I am not judging. I’m just calling it from experience.

My boyfriend accompanied my first abortion then left quickly to go surfing afterwards. The second abortion, he didn’t even go with me. I’m not trying to paint him in a bad light. Heck, I was the one on the abortion tables. But I do believe this to be a typical picture of the two sides.

I have a friend who speaks from the other side. A man who has chosen to get in the trenches and raise awareness. His thoughts on men and their role in abortions…

What I understand is this: Men have stood by apathetically on this issue because we have been told we are not part of the issue. That this is a woman’s issue not ours. We are told that we have no place in this choice, and no reason to even talk about it. That is a position I disagree with completely. The man’s role in Abortion is exactly what I plan to address from my point of view at least. There has never been a time in my life where I would say I supported abortion and I am positive it would never be an option I condone. But I can also say I never got close enough to it to understand and see both sides. I had never gotten dirty in the trenches, and learned the lessons. Lessons I could work with and through beyond the mission field. I had not seen the faces and emotions involved. I had not seen and experienced the spiritual battle raging…I had stood by apathetically assuming I knew better and that was ok. I never knew that my apathy left me inactive in God’s Kingdom work.

I’m not a fan of protestors. Brent and I would rather stand for something than against something. It just seems more positive and effective. I am not a fan of angry believers insulting and yelling at women outside of abortion clinics either. Ridiculous. But, I can get behind believers praying over them. Encouraging them. Weeping with them. Loving on them. And that is exactly what my friend, Carl, did last year…

A man…standing up for life, in love, and rallying other men to do the same.

If you are a man reading this right now, I encourage you to read Carl’s posts about his experience as he rallied other men to see the severity of this issue. Journey with him as he witnessed, for the first time, the anguish on the faces of these young women about to make the biggest decision of their lives.

A Prayer For Life Mission

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

Category: Abortions, accountability, Authenticity, Christianity, Church, Community, Confessions, convictions, courage, Death, Faith, Family, Fathers, God, Grace, Healing, humility, Influence, Information, lessons, Life, Living, Love, men, Ministry, missions, opinion, perspective, Prayer, Servant, Spiritual, Testimony |
| February 7, 2011
29 comments

My Gifts

These are my kiddos. The two babies I never thought I would have.

I mean, as a little girl, I always dreamed of having two children. One boy – one girl.

But in the time that was lived in the in-between…I thought I had ruined that dream. I was certain I wrecked any chance of ever having children.

Worse yet, I just knew God wouldn’t allow it.

After my second abortion, at the age of 17, I realized that I may have just destroyed my chances of having children in the future. Suffering through the recovery of this, near botched, procedure it occurred to me that the odds of me ever getting pregnant again might have become very slim.

Fast forward 6 years and I’m married and pregnant with my first child, Kassidi. Having not yet told a soul about my abortions, and certainly having not accepted Gods forgiveness or having the ability to even forgive myself, I was positive God would end this pregnancy for me. I know it’s not how He works. But my heart wasn’t working quite right, either.

Fast forward eight months and I’m delivering Kassidi one month early. I acknowledged the possibility that God may take her from me right then. He may let me see her then snatch her fast away. My rationale…she would be safer with Him – not me. Not someone who was capable of, and who had, short-changed lives in the past.

But He didn’t. He could have. He had every right. But, He didn’t.

Why? Because, thankfully, He does not think, or work, like we think or work.

My childhood dream of becoming a mother came true. But I had no idea then that I would be capable of nearly destroying it. No, I didn’t see that kind of me in my little girl daydream.

I do not know why I have been blessed with these two children. I really don’t. But I do know this…they are the most beautiful gifts I have ever received. Most assuredly undeserved.

What about you…what have you been given in life that just blows your mind every time you think about it?

Category: Abortions, Childhood, Family, Forgiveness, God, Grace, Kids, Life, Living, Love, perspective, Testimony, trust |
| January 31, 2011
18 comments

Reaching back for a reminder

There is a long path from being wounded to being an overcomer.

I have been so far displaced from the hurts of my past that I can easily forget the pain and agony that is certain in the healing process.

Being a victim of mental, emotional, physical and sexual abuse…I sincerely understand the pain and trauma that comes with it all.

I can recall when Brent and I were first married and he had come home late from work one evening which made him late for an appointment later that night. He came into the bedroom, where I was, and quickly changed his clothes. In the process of this speedy, somewhat frantic, wardrobe change he quickly whipped off his belt.

Instantly…I froze. I had seen him remove it from the corner of my eye and I heard that, oh-so-familiar, swoosh sound a belt can make. In a fraction of a second I became anxious, afraid and angry at him.

Brent rushed out the door and was off to his next appointment having no idea I was sitting on our bed, frightened and angry, reliving terrible memories of abuse.

Little things like this went on for a few years. It was exhausting.

After many years spent in times of reflection, prayer and accountability, I finally came to the conclusion that I could no longer convict a person for someone else’s crimes against me.

It was unfair to them. It was unfair to me.

But I did it. I did it many times.

There were people in my life at that time who called me out and challenged me to grow. To grow away from this and to grow because of it. I am grateful for their tough love and that they did not let me stay where I was.

And this is where understanding and grace comes in. Because I, myself, have been there…I need to empathize with others who are there now.

It is wrong of me not to do so. And I’m certain I have been wrong many times. Of this, I am not proud of. I am still learning.

All this to say…Let us not forget where we have come from.

Category: abuse, accountability, Confessions, convictions, Grace, lessons, Life, Memories |
| November 11, 2010
4 comments

Grace

I love music.

I especially love music that doesn’t sound so pre-packaged and ordinary. And, honestly, there isn’t a lot of originality, in worship music at least, on the radio right now. Well, not when I used to listen to it. I gravitate more toward the ones who don’t get radio play much. They’re different. Original. Authentic.

Well, this last February, while in TN for the Re:create Conference, I got to meet Joe Day. He is a Worship leader/Pastor at one of Mars Hill’s first campus plants in Seattle…the Shoreline Campus.

What I liked most about Joe, right off, was that he was approachable. Non-pretentious. And earlier this year when I learned Joe was recording an album I knew it would be one I’d enjoy, solely from meeting him.

I was right.

Grace released on the 9th and I’ve been listening to my copy and I love it!

Finally, a worship album without all the usual cliche lines. You know what they are. I won’t give them anymore attention.

Joe…your lyrics are raw, genuine, biblically founded. The music is fresh, unique, interesting. I say…Bravo! Well done!

The CD begins with Death To Life and captivates you straight off. It’s also Kassidi’s favorite song on the CD.

There is something about each song that gets you…lyrically, musically, heart…something’s gonna get you. Driving today listening to cut #2, I Look At The Cross…“Redemption came and called my name”…Yah…lines like that grab my spirit and demands my attention. Puts my focus right where it should be.

I really believe this is an album you would enjoy. You can listen to it HERE. Songs 1, 4, 8 and 9 are currently the HodgeLodge faves. #9…wow.

Give it a listen and pick up a CD for yourself. You won’t regret it…I promise.

Joe, thank you for creating such a beautiful display of worship and art.

Category: Art, Authenticity, Community, God, Grace, music, opinion, Worship |
« Older Entries