Jul 26

July 26, 2014

I Can’t Blame My Ovaries

Some days, I just feel like crying. It’s true. I’m generally a pretty jovial, even keel, gal. I’m super slow to anger. I just take life as it comes to me – one moment at a time. But Saturday morning, it took everything I had within me not to cry. It started the second my feet hit the floor that morning. Not one particular thing set it off. It was just a feeling in my chest, my gut, and my…

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Jul 24

July 24, 2014

Cardy And Her Littles

Part of the deck at the back of our home was converted into a sunroom. It’s a spot I enjoy to sit in as often as I can. There are no walls…just windows. Currently the yard is a shade of green that takes my breath away each day. The blooms are vibrant and the bees are plenty. Just under the back windows of our sunroom are several rose bushes. Now, I like receiving roses but I do not like growing…

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Jul 24

July 24, 2014

Relentless Charlie

Disclaimer: You do not need to be a cat lover to read this post. However, if you are a cat hater I am judging you super hard right now. This is Charlie.   Charlie likes to wait around this wall for us to notice him. He peers around to get our attention, hoping we will catch his “it’s time to play!” vibes. This happens every day. At this same spot. Every single day. Some days we cave in to his…

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Jul 23

July 23, 2014

I Made A Cashier Cry

I do part of my grocery shopping at Walmart Supercenter. I know, some of you just had anxiety attacks. Our Supercenter is pretty decent and I, occasionally, enjoy my experience there. I do a few things the same way every time I visit. I enter on the left where the cosmetics, cat food, and ibuprofen are. I gradually make my way to the center of the store and mentally buy everything in housewares. Third stop is the right side of…

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Jul 22

July 22, 2014

When Relationships Are Toxic

Forgiveness is so hard. Let’s be honest – there are some people in your life that when you think about them it makes you squint your whole face super hard. Holding grudges is even harder. Holding grudges, not forgiving, holds you hostage. Not only does your whole face squint at the thought of someone but so does your entire being…down to your soul. Forgiving someone and wondering what the next step should be is pretty hard, too. There are times…

Posted in Action, Boundaries, Brave, Clarity, courage, Friendships, Grace, Honesty, humility, lessons, Life, Living, opinion, perspective, Relationships, Spirit, Spiritual | By

Jul 20

July 20, 2014

I Didn’t Mean To Make You Pay

Mom, it’s just…sometimes I feel you treat me like I’m going to do the same things you did when you were my age.   The one thing I swore to myself I wouldn’t do I have done. When Kassidi was born I made her promises. I made her a lot of promises. Sweet first born, I promise you I will not put you in harms way. Ever. I promise I will tell you “I love you” every single day. I…

Posted in Abortions, Boundaries, Childhood, Communication, Confessions, convictions, Discipline, Family, Healing, humility, Hurt, Kids, lessons, Living, Love, Memories, Mercy, parenting, Regrets, Relationships, Sex, Testimony, trust, Truth, victory, wisdom, Youth | By

Jul 14

July 14, 2014

freedom

It’s Not The Abuse. It’s The Moments After The Abuse…

The hardest part about abuse isn’t the abuse itself. I mean, yes, being assaulted physically and left bruised and bloody is pretty tough and painful, but, there’s something worse. Hiding the abuse. If you just cringed inside while reading the above statement then I am sorry. Because you, likely, have been abused and can relate to what I’m saying. Child abuse is tough because you’re usually put in the position of having to protect someone. For me it was my…

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Jun 18

June 18, 2014

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A 3C Prayer

  A while back I was praying for my bestest when three words kept illuminating and bouncing across my thoughts. Calm. Clarity. Courage. Not giving them much attention, I continue to pray for my friend. But those three little words kept making huge appearances in my minds eye. So I paused and rested with them for a moment. Struck that there were 3 C’s (it’s a bestest thing) but taken even more by their order. Calm. This preceded Clarity. The…

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Jun 17

June 17, 2014

A Sticky Confession

I have a huge childhood confession. Like, pretty big. And, pretty gross. Actually, there are two confessions. One will make you grit your teeth and the other just might send you running from me forever in disgust. Keep in mind I’m about 4-6 years old during this time. My apologies in advance. 1-Wrigley’s Gum. The stick gum. The original flavor in the yellow pack. The one whose flavor only last about 5.2 minutes. I chewed that gum all the time….

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Jun 12

June 12, 2014

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I Feel Gifted…

I just ran across this notebook from 2005 with some pages of notes in it from, what looks like, a conference of some sort. One page quickly caught my eye when I read the words, “I feel gifted…” What did I feel gifted at nine years ago? “Where do I naturally excel? Where do I feel gifted?” (Assuming this was a speakers question for the audience) “I excel in writing and creating and dreaming. I’m naturally a problem solver –…

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